After 16 years (over half of my life) on Facebook, I finally decided I needed a break.
My relationship with social media may have begun on my parents’ home computer as "tinbabe15" on Yahoo messenger when I got home from school, but it had transformed into 24/7 access to over 1,100 “friends” on Facebook, more hours than I care to admit on my phone daily, and a default to feeling anxious without my phone in my pocket.
It’s no secret that social media increases rates of anxiety and depression while lowering feelings of self worth.
According to brightfuturesny.com:
59% of adults who use social media report that it has impacted their mental health.
63% of people on social media report being lonely.
63% of parents believe social media is harmful to their children's mental health.
40% of people on social media report feeling anxious or depressed after using it.
Yet over 3 billion people are actively using Facebook and 2 billion on Instagram.
I’m not here to say you should stay off social media entirely - there’s a lot of good that comes from it too! I’m simply here to share some of my takeaways from my season away.
I’m significantly less anxious.
I hadn’t realized how out of hand my compulsive screen time had become. With every spare moment that I could have used to clear my head or say a quick prayer, instead I had been filling it with things that made me anxious such as mom-guilt to do Pinterest-worthy activities with my kids, political unrest, beautiful people with their lives seemingly put together, and the never-ending ability to refresh my screen to be more in the know. I am presently completely unaware of the current social media trends, and I feel free!
I have more time for doing the things I love.
As a mom of two, I truly believed I didn’t have time for hobbies anymore. Turns out, the few minutes of scrolling here and there were really adding up. I now have time to actually read the books I check out from the library, and I even updated our bathroom. I have more time to soak up my sweet baby boy’s milestones, to say “yes” to my preschooler's requests to play with her, and to give my husband un-rushed hugs.
Jesus did not call me to know everything about everyone.
Sure, I may have missed a bunch of birth and engagement announcements from people I haven’t seen in 15 years… But I also had the pleasure of missing out on photos of people’s lunch and getting sucked into the comment section of cringe-worthy debates. I don’t know everything about everyone anymore. I may actually even be surprised to learn some news at my next high school reunion. But Jesus had 12 close friends that he only met with in person… There must be something to that.
I have more joy and fulfillment in my day to day life.
With less comparison and more intentional presence with the people actually in the same room as me, I’ve made more fun memories and felt less alone. I feel lighter. I feel like I’ve taken back control of my attention to use it in ways that truly invest in myself and others. Now, when I have the urge to unlock my phone, I open the Bible app more often - the greatest source of joy and fulfillment.
There’s a good chance I’ll get sucked back into social media sometime soon, but the time away has shaped my mental health for the better. When my screen time usage notifications start to concern me again, I just may take time away again.
Join me if you wish!
Joyfully in Jesus,
Kristin Harman
St. Paul's Lutheran Church
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